she's just saying...

Major Groan Ahead

Wait! Another Easter joke!

From my online friend Noni:

A man was driving along the highway and saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the Easter Bunny jumped in front of the car and was hit.

The driver, being a sensitive man and animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road. He got out seeing what happened to the rabbit.

The Easter Bunny was dead. The driver felt so awful that he began to cry.

A woman driving down the highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car, and asked the man what was wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explained. "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it."

The woman told the man not to worry. She knew what to do.

She went to her car trunk and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead Easter Bunny, and sprayed the contents of the can onto the rabbit.

Miraculously, the Easter Bunny came to life, jumped up, waved its paw at the two people and hopped down the road!

Ten feet away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved at the two people again, hopped down the road another 10 feet, turned, waved, and hopped another 10 feet, turned and waved and repeated this again and again until it was out of sight.

The man was astonished! He couldn't figure out what substance could be in the woman's spray can.He ran over to the woman and demanded, "What was in your spray can? What did you spray onto that rabbit?"

The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair Spray - Restores Life to Dead Hair - Adds Permanent Wave."

Easter? So soon?

It's Easter! and you know what that means: time for my annual Easter joke. (I only have about four jokes in my repertoire, so by necessity have to repeat them.) I've been preparing for it all day (that's a hint).

Those of you who were reading last year, please stand back and let the new kids play.

Ahem. Here goes:

Q.  What do you get when you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole?

A: 

Got it? Written answer tomorrow.

Studless

We're having a lovely winter snowstorm here today.

It's not that winter here is so harsh; it's pretty sunny and temperate. It's that it's so long. Remember this snowy post on October 4? Well, six months later and it's exactly the same. I like snow, even though I no longer recreate in it. It's cozy and pretty; unlike rain, which is just wet.

The title of this post is not referring to my current relationship status (however appropriate). I'm talking tires. This is the land of the winter tire. Oregon still allows studs, those annoying loud wheels that chew up our streets. The rule is that they have to be off by March 31. This year, after many angry citizen phone calls and dire accident warnings, the state has relaxed the deadline to April 11.After that, $190 fine.

I have "studless" tires that do a fine job. I think it's funny that they're called studless - why aren't they just called tires?

So here's our vocabulary quiz for the day, to while away your time stuck in that endless meeting. What are other examples of words that describe a normal state by referring to the lack of a modifying condition? (And how else would you describe that kind of word?)

You may submit your answers below. Keyboards ready? Begin!

diamonds on the sole of her tires

Weird Words of the Week

(And it's only Thursday)

Freemium: heard in a business meeting: "Are you giving out anything to get people to join the club?" "Oh, a freemium? We will be doing a sweepstakes..."

Prizing: as in "...an exciting demo weekend of activities, events, the celebration of golf and plenty of additional prizing."

Lotionized: (see bottom of can)